Overcoming Low Self-esteem made easy

What Is Low Self Esteem And What Are The Symptoms?

When you first look at newborn babies you realize that they’re completely untarnished and unscathed from the world that lies before them.

We weren’t born with a low self esteem, it is shaped from our life experiences and our interaction with our peers and it forms the basis of how we see ourselves, both the good and the bad.  A major part of how we view ourselves is through the perspective of others.

It’s true, how often do you have the wind taken out of your sails when someone doesn’t like you simply because you laugh too loudly?

Subconsciously you begin to think the same thing about yourself and before you know it you’ve sustained yet another battle chink in your self esteem armor.  Years down the track, your armor tends to look a little worse for the wear, beaten and battered you feel deflated and self defeated.  All of these experiences eventually shape you into who you become.

elf esteem issues are most often the most difficult to detect because the wounds aren’t inflicted physically and people can’t see the damage you’ve sustained over the years.  It’s not until the deep seeded issues rear their ugly head that you finally realize you need help.

The beautiful thing about self esteem is that it’s resilient, it can be repaired and fortified and you’re going to learn some tips to help you do just that.

There are a myriad of reasons that cause people to develop low self esteem which have either been inflicted by other people, the person themselves or both.

A person that suffers from low self-esteem presents with common as well as predictable behavior patterns and in some instances may even become seriously ill depending on the severity.

When it comes to low self-esteem it’s possible to develop side effects such as high blood pressure, IBS, indigestion, heart disease, anorexia and other related illnesses.

A person suffering from low self esteem will show signs of:

  • Aggression towards other people as well as towards themselves
  • Constant negative self talk such as “I can’t do this” or “I won’t succeed” etc
  • They usually have a concave posture
  • They speak quietly as well as speak down of themselves
  • They will avoid any conflicting situations
  • They prefer to be alone and do not socialize much if at all
  • They hardly participate in any outdoor activities
  • In severe cases anorexia may be present

Low self-esteem can lead to drug abuse, alcohol abuse, eating disorders, nervous breakdowns and even suicide.

People that fall into this category need to seek professional help as they are unable to help themselves.

Depending on the severity of low self esteem there are other methods such as self help programs as well as an array of self help books which are more suited to those that have a mild form of low self esteem. If you or your child or even a friend suffers from extreme depression as a result of low self-esteem find help immediately, chances are that you or they require professional help from a medical practitioner.

Why Do Children And Teenagers Suffer From Low Self Esteem?

Children and teenagers suffering from low self-esteem have increased considerably over the past decade and have been well documented by psychologists. Many parents are concerned with this epidemic as a parent’s natural instinct is to ensure their children’s well-being comes first and foremost.

Children from a young age can already start developing low self esteem and this is due in part to parents that force their children to be competitive instead of allowing their child to develop their own character and personality at their own pace.  Children will carry this low self-esteem through to their teenage years and in most instances through to adulthood, which can result in psychological as well as physical illnesses later in life.

Low self esteem in teenagers can be caused by a variety of factors such as competitiveness, high school peer pressure, acne, being overweight as well as academic parent pressure.  Children can be really nasty and vindictive towards their peers; the thing that drives these bullies to participate in unwanted behavior is that they themselves are battling self-esteem demons of their own.

Children that have grown up in an abusive environment will inevitably carry the stigma of low self esteem through to their adulthood and one will note that these children also suffered during their school years as most were not achievers.  As adults they normally do not “fit in” and as a result end up with ill health or revert to drugs, alcohol and possibly suicide as a solution to their problems.

When it comes to parenting the most important thing a parent can do is to provide a loving and nurturing home for their children and to create a foundation whereby their children can build confidence and self-esteem.

Think long-term; what future impact will your words that you say now have further down the track?  Never tell a child that they are stupid or that they will never amount to anything in life as they will grow up believing this.

Love and accept your child for who they are because not all children will be little Einstein’s but they in turn will possess unique qualities that these little Einstein’s don’t have which they should be acknowledged and praised for in their own right.

Parents should not diminish the importance of a child’s learning years. Teach your children integrity, honesty and commitment in a loving manner and always lead by example.  You are the best learning lesson for your children, your actions are just as important as your words.  There are many books on parenting skills as well as workshops you can attend. If parents are balanced and exude confidence, your children will follow suit.  Remember what I said? children come into this life unscathed and perfect, what they learn about life they learn from you this is why the first 5 years of their life are the most formative.  Give them a strong foundation to grow from and you’re giving them a good start to life.

What Causes Low Self Esteem In Adults?

Self esteem issues in both children and adults have dire consequences, the only difference is the factors that cause low self esteem in adults is a little different than for children and teenagers this is because the older you get, the bigger your world becomes and the more factors there are at play effecting self esteem.  Your world suddenly becomes more complex to include divorce, relationship problems, spousal abuse and greater responsibilities and obligations at home and at work.  All of these things can attack the self-esteem of an adult from the inside out.

There are many factors that cause low self esteem:

  • The death of a loved one
  • Being bullied at home, school or in the workplace
  • Personal loss
  • Any underlying psychological illness such as bipolar ADD, ADHD or others
  • Divorce
  • Poor finances
  • Severe health problems
  • Unemployment

Some of these symptoms may be present as an indicator of low self esteem:

  • Blaming others for their problems and misfortunes
  • Treat themselves badly
  • Are quick to lose their temper over simple issues
  • Consumed with desire to get even with people
  • Continuous negative self talk

In most cases these people are either unemployed or will remain in the same job their entire life and in several instances are unable to maintain important relationships and key friendships for long periods of time.

Most refuse to invest any effort to go forward or change their situation.  This is of course a never-ending cycle where the outcome of their actions furthers cements their internal self belief that nothing good will happen so why even try?  Little do they realize that life is unpredictable and that while you may lose some of your battles, you also win some too.  It always evens out in the grand scheme of things, that’s just how life works.

What Are The Psychological And Health Effects Of Having A Low Self Esteem?

Humans create their own reality and have the ability to program their mind to work either for or against them.  The mind constantly creates one’s own reality and whether you choose to believe this or not, is a scientific fact.

Your state of low self esteem does not really exist except as thoughts in your own mind. The only thing that can disturb one is their own thoughts.  Any statements, beliefs or suggestions from other people have no power over you.  The power comes from the weight and importance you delegate to such opinions, so it’s with your permission that you give that power.  Remember the old expression?, nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.

Nobody has power over you unless you assign them that power.  It’s these same inner thoughts that determines what you think about yourself, in other words, you are what you think or as the famous expression goes “so a man thinketh, so is he”.

The mind is exceptionally powerful and when you are still and your mind is relaxed your conscious thoughts sink into the subconscious mind, these are the seeds that grow positive or negative thought patterns which forms the basis of a healthy or unhealthy self esteem.

The mind stimulates the brain which in turn controls the physical body, negative thoughts have a severe impact on the body causing mental or physical illness as the neurotransmitters in the brain such as serotonin, adrenaline and dopamine directly affect your mood, appetite as well as physical performance.  It’s important to think good thoughts because again, you really are what you think.  Who would have known that our thoughts could influence our physical bodies to such a degree?  So it pays to disrupt your current thought patterns and to retrain them with new, positive ones.

Exercises That Can Help Build Confidence and Increase Self Esteem

Self-esteem exercises needn’t be complicated and can be implemented on the spot.  Just by simply changing your stature has a positive effect on your mood.  Don’t believe me? just try and be depressed by standing upright with a cheesy grin on your face.  It’s incredible the signals that your facial muscles send to your brain.  It signals the brain that you’re happy and are experiencing euphoria, when that happens you begin to believe it and actually feel it.

We know when people are depressed just by looking at their body language.  You know those people, the ones with the slumped shoulders and the glum expressions on their faces.  Their facial muscles are signaling their brains that they are sad and depressed and before they know it, every fiber of their being is convinced, that’s all it takes.

Did you know it takes fewer muscles to smile than it does to frown?   Practice smiling in front of a mirror.  Even when you feel down, pick up those shoulders, puff out your chest and smile.  Fake it until you make it meaning that you may not feel like a rock star but if you mimic the confidence of one, sooner than later you’ll begin to feel it and the way others view and treat you will cement the experience for you.

People want to be around those who bring out their best because everyone wants to feel good about themselves and this has a flow on effect to the person making them feel good.  Not only do you gain more friends that respect you and want to be around you but you also feel good in the process and before you know it, your thoughts, feelings and actions have re-shaped your life.

You can completely makeover your life at your own will.  Just remember at any time you can change your life, you may not be able to change your circumstances but realizing that you can change how you react to them is a powerful thing.

When you realize that you alone hold the key to your own happiness and nobody else, you will find more joy in life.

You make a difference, you were born for a reason and your life has value.  You’re meant to be here.  So be the change you want to see.

So I hope you’ve gained some insight in terms of your own self-esteem and how you can change your situation at any given moment, you just have to do it even if you don’t feel it initially.  You won’t always feel motivated to be positive but it’s important that you try because it limits the time you spend depressed and feeling low.

Doesn’t it make sense?  You can’t feel depressed and euphoric at the same time.  So when you feel great, feelings of depression and negativity take a back seat.  You just have to do this regularly and ensure that you’re feeling more good than bad.  You determine this.  It’s natural to have bad days too, if you didn’t you wouldn’t be human but you don’t have to stay mourning in those moods for longer than you need to.  When you stay locked in depression or feeling down you’re missing out on life.

Remember, if you find it difficult to shake “the blues” or bouts of depression and experience severe, ongoing episodes and you can’t build up your self esteem no matter what you do, you should consider consulting a medical practitioner right away.  Never be afraid to talk about it with loved ones, a problem shared is a problem halved.

If you want to learn more about your self esteem in greater depth and more detailed self-esteem building information and exercises then you will definitely want to get access to the entire self esteem building manual.  It’s easy to do and you can finish reading it and taking action within a day.

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